Only in my head

I think when I met you,
I thought, you had to be different
Someone that I imagined in my head
Somebody that was more comfortable.

I think when I met you,
You seemed like someone that cared
A friend I thought I could lean on
A person I should hold on.

I think when I met you,
You seemed so cute and calm
Smoking your cigarette
Talking about your deepest regrets.

I think when I met you,
I wasn’t sure why I decided to meet you
Whether you were a palete cleanser
Whether you would be a heart chaser.

I think when I met you,
I liked you but as a friend
As someone I could trust my dog with
A male confidant to share stories with.

I think when i met you,
I didn’t realise I wouldn’t meet you after
I did not think that I would care
And that I would move away forever.

I think when I met you,
I didn’t think we would still be friends
I didn’t think you would talk
I think I expected it to end.

I think when I met you,
I should have grabbed and kissed you
Told you, that I wanted you as my forever
And that you made my heart glitter.

I think when I met you,
I did it all wrong.
Because now I wish I met you,
Only in my head.

-Jeru

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